I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
