I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Are my feet made of real feet?
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
