This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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