he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
