did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
