you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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