Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Randomize
