Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
