I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
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