i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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