Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
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We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
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Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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