My hand turned me down
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
