I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
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