I'm jealous of your bromance
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
you traded sex for a burrito?
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
