hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
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