Soap is not a condiment
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
