your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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