Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
NoShamevember. You game?
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
