Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too high and old for this...
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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