My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
