i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I need a beard to bite.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.