Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
