you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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