apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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