Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
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I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
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We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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