On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
operation harelip BJ is a go
It was confusing and full of hummus
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
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