Where did you get a picture of my penis
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
