Is it normal to miss your booty call?
home. puking in laundry basket.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize