Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
