dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Two words: nipple clamps
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