I wish i was in the wii world.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
