sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
