Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
