It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
