you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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