Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
