i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Randomize