I accidentally burped into my bong.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize