My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
