Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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