I want to walk on stilts...naked
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
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