I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize