I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
We just shotgunned beers for America
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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