You're my little dorito
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
