nut hugger
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
