Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize