And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
