Can Purell be used as lube?
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Randomize
