dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
