see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Randomize
