why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
