I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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