I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
